But I'm just a little girl...

Financial Aid

2007-06-23T14:15:00.000-07:00

Wow, school is expensive. Duh--I knew this, but now I really know it. This year's cost of attendance (tuition + living) is higher than originally estimated by the school, plus I'm not even sure if I can really live off of what'll be left over. So I might have to borrow even more. Yikes.

Thinking of it all as one large sum is rather scary, yes. And thinking about the interest I'll accrue over the 10+ years to pay it off...even scarier. But maybe I should choose to think about it as a small monthly fee that I'll just have to pay for the rest of my life. That's not so bad, right? Ha...ha...

I need scholarships.

Admit Weekend

2007-04-30T08:57:00.001-07:00

So I attended admit weekend this past Friday and Saturday.

I must say I've never felt as introverted as I did during this weekend. On the first day, I felt a bit overwhelmed by other admits' eagerness to talk about themselves and about business school. We already had so much information to take in from the first-year ambassadors, faculty, and alumni that were there--did we also need to spend every waking moment discussing our goals and rehashing our application essays?

It's not that I lacked excitement about attending--I'm just still in "whew it's over let's relax!" mode. And I intend to stay there for a while!

But this was a "sell" type of weekend as many admits hadn't made the decision to attend yet, so as someone who's submitted their deposit already, I had a different perspective on the event. I just wanted to sit back and get a feel for what I'd be in for (and who I'd be there with) come this fall.

I made a few friends, most of them like me--and by the second day I was starting to enjoy myself. People in general began to relax and have a little fun. Overall, it was a good experience, and the weekend confirmed a lot of random things I've read or heard about bschool in general:

-bschool "divas" do exist, and shamelessly at that!
-no matter where I go, some people are just assholes
-half the class is going to have a serious advantage in my first finance class
-cold calling is scary, and shrinking in my seat doesn't help
-dim lights and alcohol make for a great networking environment
-everyone is incredibly diverse in what they have to offer
-despite feeling a little intimidated, I deserve to be there as much as anyone else

addendum: hmm, judging by the comments I've received below, I worry that my post has come across a little more negative than I'd intended. It was a rough start, and there were some overwhelming personalities, but everyone settled in by the second day, and I did have a good time and met a lot of good people. I'm not any less excited about going--but I did find it amusing to encounter a few typical bschool stereotypes in person :)

Best of Blogging?!

2007-04-24T17:33:00.000-07:00

Wow! I wasn't expecting to win anything--especially anything related to being funny. I recall last year's winner, MBAJackass, being truly hilarious. But I'm honored to have brought a light chuckle or at least a tight-lipped smirk to the otherwise stoic, stonefaced mba applicant community ;)

Thank you for the award! And thanks to all the other applicant bloggers out there who've been sharing their experiences.

THE GMAT

2007-04-11T16:53:00.000-07:00

Call me nerdy, but this is my favorite part of the process. The test is challenging, but the answers and score are concrete. No need for self-assessment or reaching deep into your bschool motivations; all you will ever want out of this step is a (high) three digit number.

In fact, the GMAT is your first opportunity to put a big fat gleaming star on your profile (which could potentially detract some attention away from your bad gpa, limited work history, or felonies--all things which you now cannot change). And it's only a test. There are countless preparatory materials for it--not to mention tons of helpful, FREE online resources. And if you are fortunate to have test-loving friends like myself, you've also got free tutors. There's no reason why you can't do well. So get started!

My thoughts/advice on the GMAT:

Schedule it.
As my roommate has nagged over and over, "if you don't schedule the test, there is no sense of urgency." You could end up putting it off forever. Think about why you don't want to schedule it--worried you won't be ready? Well you won't be ready unless you study, and chances are, you won't study that hard until you schedule it! You don't have to schedule it for tomorrow, or next month, or in the next three months, but it helps to have a solid D-Day. You want it to be in the back of your head at all times. You need that reason to turn down social events to stay home and study. And guess what? Your friends are probably tired of hearing your bullshit about how you're going to go back to school, so prove them wrong and get serious about it. :)

Study.
Yes, obviously--but I think it's good to have this planned out. I set a schedule that I managed to stick to for the most part. But all I did was chug straight through the books and questions, without timing myself, and without really thinking about what I needed to work on. This was a big mistake on my part! Okay, so there is SOME self-assessment involved. Take the time to look back at what you suck at, and delve deep! Not just "verbal" or "sentence correction" but SPECIFICALLY what type of sentence correction questions? Why do you get them wrong? Figure it out and conquer it!

Use the Official Guide.
I made another major mistake in not using the guide (or at least flipping through it) sooner. I drudged through Kaplan and Kaplan 800 (which in its own right, is a good book) first without looking at the only book that used REAL ex-questions. I chose not to study REAL gmat questions until halfway through my timeline! Big mistake there--plus, relying on Kaplan and Kaplan tests was discouraging. While I wouldn't say Kaplan is "harder," I'd say overall the experience of testing with Kaplan questions is not as straightfoward as the O.G./GMAC tests or the real GMAT. My scores were all over the place and I occasionally would get scores in the 500's. The two official GMAC sample tests I took produced the same 700+ score, and were reflective of my final, real GMAT score (Which was even higher--woohoo).

Take a class. Or not.
My roommate (applied a year prior) took a Kaplan class and regretted it. It seemed that most people in the class hadn't been in school for several (I think 7+) years and had little to no quantitative skills. Can't say that's reflective of all classes, or all Kaplan classes, but that was his experience. He advised me not to sign up, so I didn't, and we ended up scoring within 10 points of each other. I do believe that you can learn it all on your own, but a class provides that "kick in the butt" some of us need to keep a regular study schedule going. Figure out if it's right for you--just don't wait on it.

Calm down.
My own panic probably cost me 10-20 points on the exam. That's what I'd like to think, anyway. I distinctly recall answering question #3 on the math section incorrectly--and agonizing over it during the remainder of the quant. I realized a second after I made my answer final that I'd missed something! While that would make anyone a little frazzled, I must admit to being quite panicked about the test weeks before I took it! DEFINITELY find your own way to relax and do not drive yourself crazy over the "what ifs" --because by now you should have studied hard and well and could only do awesome. DO NOT study up until the test; take at least the day before off. Cramming is useless--the GMAT doesn't really gauge your verbal & quantitative know-how as much as it does your under-pressure test-taking abilities!

Pick a theme song.
This is vital. Or okay, maybe a theme song isn't for everyone...but plan something positive to do after your test and focus on how great you'll feel doing it!

Celebrate!
You've conquered one of the scarier hurdles in this arduous process. Round up the dear people in your life who will never quite understand what you just went through and have a drink, on them! Or a fabulous steak dinner. Or a shopping spree. :) Just don't think about bschool for a good few days!

A journey of a thousand miles begins with one single step!

2007-04-09T12:39:00.000-07:00

First and foremost--should you go to business school?

I can't answer this question because I'm not you. Besides the generic reasons of more general business knowledge, more career flexibility, and more cheddah--I think it's important to find your own motivation for going. Although, I don't think it has to be so concrete that you could write your career goals essay just yet. Of course, that's awesome if you already can.

I admit to thinking about business school for a good year before I ever picked up a GMAT book. I think, like most things, an MBA is only as good as what you make of it. Being a career switcher, some of the questions I kept in mind through the whole beginning process is:

Ultimately what do I want to get out of school?
What could I do with the next few years instead of business school?
Where will that get me?
How important is school brand to me?
Am I only thinking of top 5, top 10, or top 30 schools?
How much time and money am I willing to sacrifice (or borrow)?
Is there anything else currently more pressing in my life that will take time away from the application process?

That last question leads me to the most important part of the initial self-assessment: Are you really going to do it?

Talking about business school and flipping through a GMAT book every once in a while isn't enough to get you in. Don't bother half-assing your way through the process, especially if you want to go to a relatively selective school.

A friend's uncle coined his own version of the acronym NATO, which stood for "No Action, Talk Only." (Helps to think of it being said with an elderly Asian man voice.) I use it regularly to describe those aspiring "someday, I'll go back to school" folks who indeed only talk about it. Either decide to do it or decide not to do it. You have to kick your own ass if you want this! I promise you that the application process itself is already incredibly rewarding and marked with milestones of personal acheivement. And that's before you even go to bschool! So before you sign up for Kaplan classes or order countless school brochures, make a conscious mental comittment to getting your MBA! GO BIG OR GO HOME! And please, don't be NATO.

Best of Blogging? Me? Aw, Shucks!

2007-04-06T08:10:00.000-07:00

I'm rather surprised at this nomination since my update rate dropped once I started getting those disheartening dings. But I'm quite flattered!

I do have heaps to share on the entire process--especially since I have many friends applying for c/o 2010. Once people stop handing me those pesky celebratory vodka-sodas and Amstel Lights, I'll have a free hand or two to provide more substantial posts.

YES!

2007-04-04T20:17:00.000-07:00

After 2 rejections, 1 transcript snafu, and the heartache of being waitlisted---

I've been officially accepted.

Yay! I'm going to Business School!!!

(more details later; more alcohol now)

Valentines Day in the Express Line

2007-02-14T21:24:00.000-08:00

The conveyer belt in the express line at Vons reflected everyone's plans for their romantic evening--

Old man behind me: Bottle of champagne and box of cordial cherries
Tatooed teenager in front of me: Chocolate mousse, strawberries, and gel frosting in a tube (?)

Suser: 5 bricks of Tofu, 2 bags of carrots, 1 bag of green beans.

True story! But single life's been kind to me so it's alllll good.

Must get it together.

2007-02-10T09:53:00.000-08:00

So there I was, patiently enduring the agonizing wait for the decision from school 3, and wondering why it seems that EVERYONE has heard but me. I couldn't take it anymore and I call--only to find out that they never received my transcript from my undergraduate school, and never told me. Now I've reordered two copies (and will have a friend personally walk-in a third), and must wait another 2-6 weeks for a decision. I'm practically an R2 applicant now.

Upon finding this out, I had a breakdown. I'd built up so much anxiety over the past few weeks and had put my life on hold for this decision. I didn't know what to do with myself. But after last night's sorrow-drowning binge on miller lite and cookie crisp (I'm a classy gal), I realized that I really can't go on for the next month being paralyzed with uncertainty.

If I'm rejected, I will reapply. If I get in, I will be joyfully celebrating up until the first day of class.

Until then, I have a few weeks to tackle the other parts of my life that have been neglected. I've challenged myself to a mini-life-makeover/refinement by setting a few goals:

Lose the annoying 5 pounds I gained last year
Clean my place thorougly and redecorate/refurnish
Attend to things I've been putting off: dentist, passport renewal, etc.
Mentally divorce self from toxic people
Start taking yoga again
Finish half-read books in nightstand drawer
GO OUT every weekend and stop moping

If I do end up getting dinged after all this---at least I won't be feel flabby, messy, lazy, AND rejected, ha. And thank you to those bloggers who've posted about their reapplication process and who've shot me some encouraging words, I appreciate it. :)

outlook is grim

2007-01-23T17:28:00.000-08:00

So far, I've only gotten dings, and I feel like I need to prepare myself for the possibility of not getting in anywhere. What then? Apply in 4th round to 'safer' schools, re-apply in the fall, or postpone the whole thing altogether and find a more immediate way to make a career change (i.e. ...new job)?

My most recent interview for my "safest" school was by far the hardest. I'm not sure if I misinterpreted her demeanor and tone, but I felt a tinge of hostility and condescension from my interviewer, and the questions asked for much more specificity compared to my prior interviews for more "difficult," top 10 schools (all to be revealed later!). Perhaps she was just testing my ability to keep it cool but--most people who've interviewed with her have claimed she was quite nice and conversational. I suppose I tried my best and have done all that I can.

All my eggs are now in one basket, and all I can do now is wait. And wait... and wait...

Dear Suser, Ding! - Love, Kellogg

2007-01-04T20:09:00.000-08:00

I'm not shocked nor heartbroken, but a little disappointed, of course. I saw it coming. Part of me wants to scream, WHY DONT YOU WANT ME, KELLOGG?!? But i'm trying not to take it personal. :)

I love my friends. And

2006-12-30T00:55:00.001-08:00

I love my friends. And beer.

vague and angsty

2006-12-28T18:25:00.000-08:00

I really wanted to keep this out of my blog but I can't! So here it is: I made a lot of mistakes this year as a newly single person. Nothing so disgusting or shameful that I need to take a lysol-bath or anything like that--but I made a lot of really bad calls with my dating life: who, why, where, when, all of the W's, really, including "What the hell?" and "Whoa there turbo!"

And the worst part is, I can't entirely escape these mistakes. I am REALLY looking forward to the new year so I can use that as an excuse to start anew, clear my thoughts/contact list, and rejoice over b-school acceptances, rather than giving myself a migrain over useless high school drama.

christmas

2006-12-25T03:07:00.000-08:00

i've had a great holiday weekend, but i'm feeling a bit guilty because i got a ton of useful / interesting / cool gifts including the new ipod shuffle, a flash drive, a hilarious 'boyfriend' pillow...and I just got everyone corny tshirts that they'll be too embarrassed to wear out. doh!

WEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

2006-12-01T00:54:00.000-08:00

SUBMITTED THE LAST ONE! HURRRRAH! ITS A CELEBRATION BITCHES!

i miss...

2006-11-27T00:22:00.000-08:00

crocheting little scarves
crafting stuffed felt monsters
making jewelry
eating healthy
sleeping well
blogging regularly
stalking celebrities
having a clean room and desk
actually using my netflix subscription
not dressing like a slob

gee, what a glamorous life i gave up to apply to bschool

Theme Songs

2006-11-18T12:59:00.000-08:00

I must say I have to highly recommend picking ridiculous, but motivational theme songs throughout the application process. Given the process is so grueling, I suggest having one for each milestone - GMAT, Essay completion, Interview, and of course ACCEPTANCE. Maybe a reflective, encouraging rejection song as well.

so far mine are:
GMAT theme (and celebration dance): Kanye West - Celebration
Interview completion: Fergie - Fergalicious

The more ridiculous, the better! Don't go searching for the right song---just wait and the song will find you. It's quite encouraging and satisfying to sing loudly on your way home, dancing behind the wheel, arms flailing in the car to lyrics like:

I'm Fergalicious (so delicious)
My body stay vicious
I be up in the gym just working on my fitness
He's my witness (oooh wee)

Try it!

P.S. - interview 2 - check!

Interview Hump Surpassed

2006-11-11T09:44:00.000-08:00

Unfortunately an interview with my top pick is required so it's no indication of hopefully being accepted. But the dude was friendly and asked the typical questions you'd expect. I wasn't sure if he was going easy on me or if I was just incredibly well prepared. He did have follow-up questions on both my career and outside activities, but they weren't especially difficult to answer. I guess I'd say they were more of his way of trying to reveal any bullshittery in my initial answers. Luckily there wasn't any :) His super-friendliness was a bit daunting since I couldn't really read him or his reactions very well. He might have been humoring me the whole time.

pushby.com

Oh well, it doesn't matter now. It's over. I hadn't interviewed in quite some time so I was pretty nervous about flubbing my words together or having sweaty palms and all that. But the glass of wine an hour prior helped calm me down a bit :) Though I don't recommend that to anyone who doesn't usually become a little more charming and animated with alcohol.

And then there was one!

2006-10-23T21:15:00.000-07:00

Unreachable dream school.........check
Top 20 probable school.............check
More Likely top 30 school...........not due for a while

FREEDOM!

Oh wait. Interview approaching. Wah.

my favorite time of year

2006-10-23T18:49:00.000-07:00

Yesterday I got in a parking-lot-rage verbal altercation and the end result was my car getting keyed by some dickwad stranger who got away. Thankfully my car is so junky I initially wasn't even sure if it'd actually gotten keyed or not. But the entire incident put me in a horrible mood, as you can imagine.

But today I found the perfect pair of boots to complete my halloween costume...for $7, in my size, in the absolute most perfect color. It was a Halloween miracle! My favorite holiday never lets me down. Finally, something FUN to look forward to this fall!

Finally.

2006-10-19T21:51:00.001-07:00

I PRESSED SUBMIT.
one down, two to go

Once upon a time....

2006-10-14T18:04:00.000-07:00

Most of the comments I'm receiving from people who have been proof-reading my career-goals essay say that it lacks creativity. But I wonder how creative I can possibly be with my snore-inducing technical career history, and equally tranquilizing career goals? I don't think my essay would neccessarily bore any admissions committee to death--but a normal person, yes, probably beyond the grave.

It's difficult to take my helpful friends' advice lightly as I respect them all (an English PHD candidate, a law-school student, and a freelance journalist) and trust their essay-writing skills much more than my own, but at the same time, none are applying to business school nor know much about it. So I really don't know what type of creativity they're looking for...something gimmicky? A humorous anecdote about my glamourous IT career? It's hard to infuse personality into an essay prompt that asks strictly for career history and future career goals, as I think I'm a pretty damn interesting, well-rounded gal, but it's hard for that to be reflected in such a limited essay.

GAH.

I knew this would be hard but...

2006-09-28T18:52:00.000-07:00

Wow, writing is hard. After hours of research, outlining, speaking to MBA's and English PHD's at work, I find myself resorting to 8th grade essay prep--brainstorming with bubbles.

Ha...gotta love google images.

I have a "story" ...finally

2006-09-13T22:09:00.000-07:00

After much self-assessment, I think I've got the foundation for my "story" that will be told through my application essays. My progress was initially stagnant, and felt futile, but now it's snowballed into something that feels more solid. I am done panicking--I feel confident and excited about applying. Although I'm a little stressed and nervous about it all still, of course.

I think it definitely helped me to make note of all the post-collegiate things I've done, professional and non-professional. While I did do some sit-down brainstorming, I've also been making little notes to myself since I began considering business school. Whenever I remembered an accomplishment, no matter how small, that would contribute to my bschool story, I would jot it down. Reading other essays, looking through photographs, revisiting journal/blog entries from college all helped me gather a giant list of experiences that I feel will help bolster my candidacy.

As I'm somewhat of a career switcher, I also have been reading and researching as much as I can about the career I'm most interested in--just to get a better idea of how I can present my achievements so that they'll be the most consistent to what my career goals entail.

Though I'm still at the beginning of this process, I do feel like my own understanding of "why" I want an MBA has been relatively fleshed out. I don't feel like I had to force things to fit when they didn't--for the most part, the different pieces seem to have fallen into place.

We should be taught not to wait for inspiration to start a thing. Action always generates inspiration. Inspiration seldom generates action.

-Frank Tibolt

"Wait until next year"

2006-09-04T17:37:00.000-07:00

This was part of the advice given to me by a Harvard MBA whom I really respect and admire. He advised me to postpone applying for a year in order to make a greater case for myself for a top 5 school. He seemed very assured that if I applied to school in 07 (and spend the next year making my apps stronger) I could probably get into any school I wanted. Of course, this is just one person's opinion--but it did make me think.

Personally I feel that I'm ready to apply and that I'm ready for school, though I do see how much better I could potentially prepare in a year if I were to apply in 07. Right now, I've only planned to apply to one top 5 school. I suppose I'll assess how I feel when I'm nearing the end of the application process this fall...and when I see what schools I'm admitted to.

the MBA tour

2006-08-31T09:18:00.000-07:00

Wow, it's been a month since the GMAT and I've managed to do absolutely nothing. It doesn't help that our home's turned into a frat house--complete with cheap porch furniture, drunken "Guitar Hero" on the Playstation, and a new ping (beer) pong table. I think I stretched my post-GMAT relaxation period a bit too long.

I really only have one issue left when it comes to school selection, and that's whether or not to apply to Haas. I decided to register for the MBA tour that's coming to Los Angeles, but with the endless list of participating b-schools, I wonder if I'll really get anything worthwhile out of it...

Have any fellow bloggers gone to this event? Please share your experience with it :)

www.thembatour.com

My GMAT Experience...in great detail.

2006-08-21T08:23:00.000-07:00

My test date was on a Monday, and I studied up until Noon on Sunday afternoon. It was hard for me to drop everything and just decide that I've studied all I could. As much as I was sick of studying, it was hard to resist picking up those flashcards or thumbing through O.G. one last time. But I slammed all my prep books shut and stacked them on the floor. I was going nuts from anxiety, but I knew I was ready as I'd ever be. I spent my Sunday relaxing with friends, shopping, eating out, and sleeping early.

My test was at 1 pm Monday afternoon, and I woke up around 9 am. I didn't think I'd have trouble sleeping that night, but I ended up waking up every few hours or so. And I did dream about the test. I dreamt that I received an amazing score and was pretty damn disappointed upon waking up to realize I hadn't even taken the test yet! After I finally got up, I had breakfast, gave myself several pep talks in the mirror, and found myself with nothing to do at 11 am. I ended up lounging in front of the television and watching a few TiVo'ed episodes of Family Guy. Not exactly the best way to stimulate my brain before the GMAT, but I needed to calm myself down and a vodka shot wasn't a viable option.

Eventually 12 pm rolled around and I headed off to the test center, which was only a mile or two from my home. My heart started to pound. Looking back, I don't know why it worried me so much. Even if I didn't do well, I could have taken it again. And I knew I wouldn't completely bomb the test. But I suppose that the months of studying and hype around this test would make anyone nervous.

Certainly the security surrounding the test only gave me more anxiety. Digital thumbprints and photos, escorts to the bathroom, ID at all times?! I should have known about and expected this already, I know.

I placed all my items in the locker and went to the restroom for one final pep talk. "You can DO IT!" I told myself. Cheesy as it was, I convinced myself that I was fucking amazing and that I've come so far and accomplished so many things I never thought I could--so what's a little test? I was smart, I had studied, and I could only do well. It was now or never.

I was escorted to my computer and sat down to the writing. My analysis of an argument was about an international-themed amusement park, and my analysis of an issue was about unemployment...I think. I did well on the first, but was 3/4 through the second when I realized I wasn't really answering the question. In a panic, I inserted a paragraph into the body and a few lines into the conclusion just so it would appear as if I were answering the question. Oh well, I didn't care, it was the writing. I was unphased by my shaky performance, but did take a break to prepare myself for the quant.

It was a little irritating that my slow ass proctor started the quant section for me before I was even able to sit down. The clock was ticking and he had not moved out of the way! He also insisted on pulling my chair out for me, eating up more valuable seconds. Finally I was able to sit down and start. I was a little unnerved from losing time. I chugged through the first few questions, but realized that I might have gotten the 3rd or 4th question wrong, AFTER the fact. What a way to raise my blood pressure...After getting through half the questions, I started to feel like I was getting the hang of it. The questions were tough but I was handling them. I ended up having to guess on the last two but I was satisifed with that--as I've had to blindly guess on up to 7 in the practice tests.

Verbal was relatively easy, as it always had been for me. Like other test-takers, I found verbal to be rather relaxing as I no longer had to scribble or calculate anything. I did get a few more RC passages than I would have wanted...and each one was lengthy. I think I did feel a little too relaxed, as I felt like the worst was over, and took more time than I needed on verbal. While I usually finished with 10-15 minutes left on practice tests, I actually ran out of time like an idiot on the real thing! I blindly guessed on the last two and let out a GIANT sigh of relief.

I went through the post-test survey rather slowly, trying to treasure the happiness I felt in finishing before my world crashed down when I saw my 550 or whatever horrible score was I was expecting. Finally the page arrived where my score would be calculated. I closed my eyes and my heart was pounding harder and louder than ever. I kept peeking up at the screen but the damned thing was still calculating. Eventually, I looked up and saw my score. I saw a 7 and jumped for joy. It was better than all my practice exams! I had doubted myself too much--because I sat there in disbelief for a few seconds. I managed to get up from my seat and receive my print-out. I gathered my things and left. It was fucking over!

After a mass text-message with my score to all my friends and supporters, I happily drove home and got drunk.

Here are some tidbits for your reference. I'll save my crappy advice (if anyone out there hasn't taken the test?) for a later post.

Prep materials:

Kaplan GMAT
Kaplan GMAT 800
Official Guide 11
Kaplan pocket guide
www.beatthegmat.com's flashcards
Kaplan Kaptest CD
Official GMATprep CD

Practice Scores:

Kaplan Diagonostic: 680
Kaplan CAT 1: 580
GMATprep CAT 1: 710
Kaplan CAT 2: 560
GMATprep CAT 2: 710

THE REAL THING: >710
Official Writing Score: 5

ITS OVER

2006-07-31T17:09:00.000-07:00

I beat the GMAT. :) Details later. I'll leave you with this Kanye West lyric:

I just thought you should know
We hit the liquor store
Got some Cris and some Mo
And we about to let it floooooow
Had some problems before but see we let em go
Got an ounce of that dro
And we about to let it bloooooow

Yeah, you know what this is
It's a celebration, bitches!
Grab a drink, grab a glass
After that, I grab yo ass

Whatever doesn't kill me....

2006-07-25T13:47:00.000-07:00

The flea situation seems to be in control, though I have a feeling that the war is far from over. There is no lower life form on earth than the flea. Yet they seem to be rather advanced little parasites. Did you know they could detect CO2, vibrations on the ground, and body heat so that they know when to emerge from their little disgusting cocoons? I think I can now write a fucking book on fleas and pesticides.

On the GMAT front, I took a GMATPrep test and scored a 710. Hooray! All is not lost, after all. Snot-filled and flea-ridden, I will conquer this test, so help me god.

Now while I can't exactly dispense any advice given that I haven't taken the real test yet, I do want to mention that while I started early (April), I realize now that I didn't make the best of my study time. I was intent on getting through all my prep books, so I just charged through problems everyday and read the solutions for my incorrect answers. While this exposed me to hundreds and hundreds of gmat questions, I never really sat down and really reviewed/memorized math formulas, idioms, methods to tackle specific types of problems. I figured I would save this for the last month, which I did. Now that I've reviewed thoroughly, I find myself successfully solving quant problems more efficiently (duh). And I'm kicking myself for not doing it earlier. So in other words: Sounds obvious, but don't just do the problems--study them and their solutions in depth. Slow and steady!

Less than 7 days to go.

GMAT + flu + fleas = HELL

2006-07-22T19:21:00.000-07:00

What better to complement my single-digit number of days left till D-day than a stuffy nose, phelgm-y throat, and 30+ flea bites on my right leg??? How exactly does one catch the flu in July in Southern California when it is 110 degrees outside? And can someone explain why, after my cat's three flea-free years of life, does she decide to host an army of them NOW?

And here I was worrying about breaking 700. Hell, will I even manage to make it to the test center without passing out from the pesticide fumes in my lungs or wigging out from my flu medications???

bitch, bitch, whine, whine

2006-07-20T12:04:00.000-07:00

Why is it that all the things that have been bothering me over the course of 2006 are now back in my head, fighting for me to spend all my brain power agonizing over them? Why now, when the GMAT is a few days away? Is it that I’d rather be thinking about my aging parents’ health, my unyielding crush on an impractical someone, my financial woes, my uptight new trainee at work, my lack of general direction in life, my overall unhappiness—than be perusing through another prep book? Perhaps, but whatever the cause, it is not putting me in a studying mood.

I know, I know--I will get a grip. My troubles will always be there waiting for me, but the GMAT is at hand. I just needed to blog about it, I guess. It’s lunchtime. My math flashcards and iced americano await me at Starbucks.

chi-town travels

2006-07-13T09:02:00.000-07:00

Okay, enough test stuff, before I shoot myself. Here are some photos from my recent trip to Chicago. I didn't get a chance to visit Kellogg, but I'm hesistant to apply anyhow. I know when I'm beat. But the city is great.

panic!

2006-07-13T08:39:00.000-07:00

I decided on a whim to take a Kaplan CAT test yesterday (my second), and did poorly. Much worse than my diagnostic test. I pray this is not reflective of how I will do on my actual test day (which is approaching rapidly!!). The room temperature (freezing--but I didn't want to sacrifice time to turn the a/c off), time of day (late afternoon, after work), my nerves, and my inexperience with doing problems on a screen all help to account for the low score. Or, maybe I'm just a mediocre working stiff loser who doesn't deserve to go to B school. Ha...ha...joking. I think. But I do feel discouraged. Especially since I've been doing so well on the problems in my prep books.

Oh well, at least I learned first-hand a few things about test day (that i should have already known): dress warmly/comfortably, get a good night's sleep/a few hours of relaxing, and calm the fuck down.

Hardcore (and I mean HARRRRD) studying/reviewing begins 07.17.06. Uh, after a short stint in Las Vegas, that is. :)

the other CAT in my life.

2006-06-15T00:25:00.000-07:00

Kylie wonders if B-school would open more doors for her, as well.

the gmat really is the easy part

2006-06-12T09:29:00.000-07:00

So I admit to not exactly sticking to my studying schedule. My GMAT is in late July and I've been studying about 7-9 hours a week. I do feel like I'm learning a lot and I never feel completely overwhelmed by a question--however I do worry that I spend too much time on them, particularly on math questions. While I rarely get questions in the book wrong, I probably need to learn to do them faster...

June is such a busy month, with constant birthday celebrations, out-of-state weddings, pre-planned vacations...it is hard to study more than 10 hours a week. Although I'm technically slacking from my schedule, I am almost finished with my GMAT 800 book. I can't believe I've blown through over 1000 problems! I will be stepping up the studying, beginning today with the Official Guide.

Lately I've been panicking about business school on a daily basis. I unfortunately have a lot of self doubt and I worry that this will be reflected in my essays and interviews. While I have the same basic reasons that everyone else has for going to business school (fundamental business/management knowledge, network of peers, greater flexibility and opportunity, status, money, etc.), I worry that my current lack of a specific post-mba plan will be detrimental to my applications.

While I know I am very interested in Entrepreneurship and Marketing, I can't say for certain exactly what it is I want to do. I also wonder exactly how specific my goals need to be. A friend of mine who recently went to the USC Marshall admit weekend was told by the second-year and alumni panel that it really isn't that important to one's b-school success to have a clearly defined path prior to attending. I want to believe this, as I can't imagine knowing what I'll want to do with my degree until I've had a taste of other possibilities I might not have previously considered.

I'm doing as much research as I can. But I still feel uneasy that the answer to my "Why" question isn't solid. Then I wonder if anyone's is really solid. Or if the very detailed, specific answer on their application isn't actually the reason they're going. Should I be able to explain why I want to go to business school in a single sentence? Or a few sentences?

Ugh, now I'm panicking again!

LOST

2006-05-25T08:27:00.000-07:00

As if all the speculation and mystery in the episodes don't already infuse themselves into my brain, now websites like the http://www.thehansofoundation.org and http://www.oceanic-air.com are stealing more of my work/study time thoughts (as well as occasionally scaring the shit out of me)! I'm tempted to add The Bad Twin to my Amazon cart, but for now it's just sitting in my wishlist. Plus with random actors posing as characters in real life (i.e. Jimmy Kimmel), and the countless other (most likely official) LOST spinoff sites/advertisements...I feel like I'm being swallowed by a giant marketing monster...and enjoying it all the while.

mondays RULE

2006-05-22T23:17:00.000-07:00

Today I was approved for the raise I requested. I came home, tackled the Kaplan GMAT 800 questions (good book!), went to the gym, and enjoyed some laughs, smokes, and pinot grigio with friends. Now I'm relaxing in my room with my mp3s at full blast. I can't remember ever having such a good Monday!

wait, so i'm NOT a perfect 10?

2006-05-18T08:07:00.000-07:00

It's funny how being in a long-term relationship had made me forget that I ever had any insecurities whatsoever. I guess when I had someone by my side, telling me how amazing and perfect I was and how lucky he was to have me, I became a bit disillusioned...

But now that I'm living the single life again, I feel as though I've been hit with a tidal wave of reality: so... i'm NOT absolutely perfect? What do you mean... my jokes aren't really that funny? Why isn't every handsome available man tripping over himself to ask me out? What's this rejection word and what does it mean???

I'm not trying to be obnoxious. This singledom thing just takes some getting used to!

studying > moping

2006-05-15T01:01:00.000-07:00

I've been having a bad week (and a bad year for that matter) and everyone seemed to assume it was because I've spent so much time studying. If anything, having the GMAT to focus on is a relief, since I don't have time to sit around over-analyzing everything that's been bothering me.

I admit I'm still halfway stuck in my rut of misery but I am climbing out slowly. I ditched my study session today for leftover cake and wine, but it was neccessary to regain my sanity. I think it paid off. During lunch, a friend randomly mentioned being really happy with the people he has in his life. It made me think about the people in mine, and I concluded that I don't have anything I can justifiably be unhappy about (although, I'm sure I'll find something).

Here's hoping this week will be better than the last!

ERRR

2006-05-13T12:10:00.000-07:00

Ok, can the Kaplan software be more asinine?! I don't need sound effects or little cartoons giving me guided tours of some virtual Kaplatopia. These aren't the PSATs...

So...I did OK on my first adaptive diagnostic test (6xx) but I've got to plan a little better for my saturday morning exam time. It would probably do me well not to drink so much the night before. ...Probably. And the downstairs bathroom was being remodeled, so the hammering and drilling noises weren't helping. Nor were the visits from housemates. I'll be sure to have a "testing in progress" sign up next week.

I've been doing really well on the math in-book practice questions, but I hadn't realized how much time I'd been using per question. I've got to step that up. I was guessing with 3 seconds left on the last question for each quant section. :( And I haven't yet decided if seeing the time makes me more or less nervous...

Ok, I'll stop making excuses. I should go review my wrong answers now.

Verbal Shmerbal

2006-05-08T20:55:00.000-07:00

Today was my first day of my new study schedule and it went relatively well. I studied during my lunch break at Starbucks, but was intermittently distracted by an obnoxious couple yielding a disposable camera. But I managed to chug through the sentence correction despite the smooching and photo snapping. At home I finished up the reading comprehension. On my bed. Which wasn't the best idea, because my bed is practically a giant white goose and pretty damn comfortable. But besides falling asleep for 20 minutes, I think I studied well. Tomorrow I'll try Borders.

I realized I probably need to stop glossing over words whose definition I'm not 100% certain of. I need to actually write them down and look them up later and stop guessing from the context. So today I've confirmed the meanings of four words I've previously just made assumptions about, and that feels good. But I'm embarassed to reveal them here. I swear that they're like, big words, with a bunch of syllables and stuff. :)

I've now gotten through the verbal section, scoring at about 80-85% correct on the sample questions in the book. I haven't taken any adaptive computer tests yet, but I plan to do that this Saturday (and every Saturday morning from now on). I imagine I'll do much better on the math since math is relatively fresh in my mind from college and from the scattered SAT tutoring I've done in the past few years.

That's all that's new on the studying front.

P.S. I'm currently using the general Kaplan GMAT book, and I've got the GMAT 800 and the Official Guide books in queue.

GMAT, I shall own your ass!

2006-05-05T10:31:00.000-07:00

I finally set a date for my GMAT--late July. I did manage to get some verbal studying done during an unexpected (emergency) trip to Salt Lake City two weeks ago. Unfortunately after getting back to Los Angeles I was a little disoriented, and the trip to Vegas a few days after didn't help (but I did finally get over my fear of in-person poker). Now, I'm ready and motivated, and my study-buddy and I have officially forked out the $250, so it's time for me to get into gear!

I decided to go as early as possible with my date because I needed an additional month to re-take the exam (if neccessary) and then a good two months or so before first round deadlines. Although I haven't been hardcore studying just yet, the added pressure of it being nearby will only be good for me, I think. I'm probably overestimating my motivation with the following schedule I've set, but better I aim high while it's still early:

Monday-Wednesday: 2-3 hours in the pm
Saturday: 4 hours in the am
Sunday: 4 hours in the am

I'm sure this will require some major tweaking within my first week. As for where to study, I will attempt to try borders, where tea and coffee flow endlessly and there are fewer things to distract me. Borders was my roommate's study zone of choice and he scored a 730, so I figure it's worth a try...

800, here I come!

There is no point.

2006-05-05T08:45:00.000-07:00

The subject of this entry reflects how I began to feel in my post-college pre-adulthood mid-twenties. After I’d moved past the afterglow of the landmarks of turning 21, graduating school, and settling in to my first real job, I wondered what else there was to look foward to, besides the grim world of marriage, babies, and death.

For the past two years I’ve (somewhat passively) pursued different career paths in my spare time, from fashion designer to ebay millionaire to web developer, in hopes of finding that one thing that is supposed to make life worthwhile.

I’ve decided (for now, anyway) to pursue an MBA, and to use this blog to document my journey. Enjoy…